3 Ways To Save James Bond From Total Irrelevancy

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Do you remember the most iconic moment of the entire james bond franchise that time he almost got his penis mutilated well at moments a great metaphor for our current era in this metaphor james bond is james bond and laser is what specter is doing to his franchise we must save james bond's penis by making future james bond movies as one-offs any villain any time period any adventure and he hears the number of reasons why i got it okay we're good we got this great specter is the exact opposite of that wacky party in ghost emoji it's zero fun because it's trying way too hard to make sense in the past the bond franchise mentioned landy's dead wife once in awhile otherwise it gave zero tosses about continuity that was smart but the inspector avengers the craig movies they made hans landa into new global and made new blofeld the office of audio pain that choice took every daniel craig bond movie and made them setups for future craig movies even though specter ends with daniel craig literally driving off into the sunset that left the james bond team scrambling to find a new actor to play the after daniel crate for all of james bond infinity war parts 1 through infinity and sure i understand specters decision to copy the biggest new action franchise copying the current big new action franchise worked for skyfall crush the box office by stealing the dance mansion sadness of christopher nolan's dark knight trilogy casino royale revitalized bond by stealing the shaky cam fistfight intimacy of jason bourne movies moonraker exists because star wars happen but copying marvel's approach is more than a style decision and it's a story decision and it's fixing what ain't broke according to 538 every official james bond movie except die another day has a better-than-average imdb rating half a century of audiences like them so all you need for a good bond movie is the bond formula minus madonna + 0 context meanwhile marvel movies are drowning in context they're a bunch of prequels for prequels and a star half-a-dozen avenger actors who retire from the gig any day now unless marvel gives them arrays on their collective per movie salary of 81 million dollars and good luck with that 7b yeah because riding through marvel productions makes actors hate acting itself james bond movies can skip all that with one-offs it's not far from what they did before they be insane not to and they can even avoid breaking their stars spirit because it's hard to get it's hard to get out but come on bonds producers haven't cast a new bond james bond yes whatever it turns out to be i wish them well and ron pip cheerio and you know british stuff because an ongoing obstacle for bond franchise building is that the bond roll sucks the actor is signing on for a decade of physical trauma in the previous ones what's happened to you i've had my right shoulder reconstructed i've had this left knee operated on my right knee operated on also a 538 stats are right a bond actors feature movies will be worse regarded by critics because they can't stop remembering when the guy was inside a tuxedo and two ladies sex those long bond movie shoots also eat up too much time for an actor to express creative range by say to pick a totally random example doing here miguel tomorrow and department snowpiercer and hank williams in one very fulfilling year you can't blame daniel cream for quitting and saying he'd only come back for the money but an approach of one-off bond movies could entice a new bond actor with money and creativity having new villains and new time periods and new storylines every time that's an actor keep reinventing the rule instead of maintaining an eight-year vesper lynd memories grimace also the actor can know that if their first one off bond movie is a dud the producers can shake up the neck or if their first movie rules the producers can repeat what works that flexibility is the secret weapon of the mission impossible franchise those movies star tom cruise awesomely stupid action and ben raines's hats because those things are perfect if you only keep up what's perfect about your franchise it lives forever and it won't become an old man speaking of okay where's my fruit gun as an utterly perfect woman once said i think you're sexist misogynist dinosaur a relic of the cold war freeze enhance culture changes with politics changes i love bond movies but what day and judy said gets truer every year and bond producers you cannot respond to change with that douche smirk unless you justify it all bond movies are vaguely set in their present day which means in the new ones they make a fist fighting man's man watch other people do cyberwar but if the movies are one-offs you can do a cold war dinosaur bond and set it in the cold war so it makes sense and so the man from uncle movies can't hog all the madman fun or you can stay modern and acknowledge were past the era of heroic drunk marlboro man something to brasa and craig movies could only hint you can even innovate you know cast a minority or an american or finally start a lady spy like you considered with michelle yeoh and almost made with halle berry but we're too stodgy to do don't be staging bond producers be fun you know one tends to be good intense for last and lasting franchises are more than lucrative they can make something so iconic it's instantly recognizable even if some goofballs imitating it with a banana ok uh-huh wasted that one uh oh well it's one banana you know it's no big deal [music] if you like this video don't be silent about it please like and subscribe and share it and and help us make more of them james bond will return okay and then we just had a silencer and post
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